Reflection

Thalaind, again. Kho Pangan, again. I can't help it, I know it's utterly unoriginal, I know it's like every middle class gap year student has done it and practically every university student has done it and even mums and dads come here on their package holidays, I know I know I know but I just can't resist it, I love it here. I even found myself, much to my own shame, enjoying the ridiculous Kho San Road in Bangkok, which is becoming more and more of a joke. There's practically nothing left that's actually Thai about it any more, but the billions of beautiful clothes and funny CD stalls and pancake sellers and posers sitting in cafes all day people watching, it's fun for a while. Only a short time though.. I can't hack Bangkok for long.

But now, now the sea is perfect blue, the beaches are long and winding and the sand seems to melt underfoot. I know it's not "real" Thailand, but I've done my stint there and it's not as poverty stricken as the world makes out. The Thais are easy going, up for a good time. Here on this island they're part of the party, not just doing it for the silly white people. Some of them are even all dreadlocks and long hair and tattoos just like the crustified hippies and I no longer feel like I'm forcing my culture on a place which doesn't want it. And the girls wear trousers and skirts above the ankle and have real jobs and smile at you and talk to you like they talk to each other. And the men do stare a little and some try to talk to you in the wrong way but only a little bit and you can put them off the scent with an easy smile and a 'no thank you'. I've been here before but this is the first time I've really had the culture shock - I used to think Thailand was backward, but coming from India, it feels like I'm in modernville. That's bad in many ways, losing culture and what-not, but I'm all for it, the people are happier that way. They have good food and good shops and there are plenty of jobs out there. And in India, for the poor, culture and religion is everything they have and they can't aspire to anything else. The cast system still has effect and it keeps people in their place. India India Indiaaaaa! All I can think about is bloody India. The thoughts come flooding in. Cows in the streets, whole families balanced on one motorbike, litter litter litter piled up high in the slums, beggars and more beggars and the guilt of it all the time, and a bunch of kids throwing stones, actually throwing big stones at two Israeli girls for no reason whatsoever.

Did I like it? I don't know, but I find myself missing it; it constantly feeds and winds its way back into my thoughts, twisting and turning my mind in an odd way I find difficult to understand. I guess I'm just still in shock at how different it is. Thailand isn't different really, you can be you and nobody bats an eyelid any more, the way of life is (oh please don't do it... oh but I've got to.. here goes...) same same, but different. I can't believe I just said that.

But India is another world, I'm going to go on about it because it really really REALLY is ANOTHER WORLD and earth is a bigger place than I had thought and you just have to see it to believe it.

Go. Go and see.